If you're like most parents, the one part of vacation you dread the most is keeping your kids occupied during a two-, three- or five-hour plane trip. In the larger scheme of things, though, the time spent in the air is the easy part; what you should really be concerned about is herding your kids into and through your local airport, and through and out of the airport on the other end. Here's how to go about it.
Take charge of the luggage. Your eight-year-old son would lose his head if it weren't securely attached to his neck-so trusting him with a piece of carry-on luggage (even if it's full of his own stuff) is a siren call to disaster. After you've checked the big items, keep the carry-on items out of the kid's hands, at least until you've reached the loading gate.
Steer clear of the shops. If you're smart, you'll already have equipped each of your kids with his own Game Boy and some extra batteries, so cries of "But Mom! I'll need something to play with on the plane!" will fall flat. Also, the less time you spend in a store is the less time in which your four-year-old daughter can accidentally knock over a bottle of 12-year-old bourbon.
Insist on good behavior. Airport security personnel enjoy a good joke every now and then, but they may not appreciate your kids playing "cops and robbers" as they pass through the metal detectors. Also, if you have a wiseacre 12-year-old, warn him ahead of time not to say things like, "Hey, Dad, what about those sticks of dynamite you're carrying under your shirt? Dad? Dad?"
Weave like ducks. An airport at the height of the holiday season is not a good place to move in "family knot" formation-you know, mom and dad in the middle, with the kids circling around like electrons and whacking other passengers on the knees with their carry-on bags. Instead, have mom or dad take the lead, with the kids directly behind in single file, and dad or mom bringing up the rear to keep an eye on any stragglers.
Don't let them near the conveyor belt. When you pick up your luggage after your flight, your kids will want-more than anything else they've ever wanted in their entire lives-to take a ride on the motorized belt. Unless you want your youngest daughter to wind up in the luggage hold of Estonia Airways Flight 208, keep your kids well behind the partition under the eye of a watchful adult.
